A Recognised Loss
by Annie Coomes
Summary: As the Doctor encounters a small child who looks eerily familiar he has to see Rose 6 years after their explosive argument bringing up unwanted, unanswered questions. COMPLETED!
1. Part One

Summary: As the Doctor encounters a small child who looks eerily familiar he has to see Rose 6 years after their explosive argument bringing up unwanted, unanswered questions.

Disclaimer: I'm afraid I _still_ don't own Doctor Who

Thanks to Cassy, S'rianna, and Viggly for your help with the title and your thoughts!

Enjoy!

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A Recognised Loss

Part One

_You and I will meet again, when we're least expecting it, one day in some far off place I will recognize your face, I won't say goodbye my friend, for you and I will meet again._

Rose clutched the piece of paper on which the Doctor had written a Tom Petty quote on – they'd had an argument, unlike any other they'd had before. This was the kind of argument that really does signify the end – she had cried and yelled and thrown things, he had shouted and raged and ducked. Now she stood leaning against the wall of the Powell Estate's block of flats in 2006, her bags around her that she had hastily packed as she cried and screamed, she had opened a bag to get a tissue but instead she had found the note. The note that he must have snuck in there as she yelled abuse at him and threw her bags out of the Tardis doors, a note that made her regret the last 24 hours more than anything in her entire life. Now she was truly alone, well not entirely alone she thought as her hand pressed gently over her stomach – she would never be alone again she knew as she watched the spot where the Tardis had disappeared.

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**Six Years Later**

The Tardis came to a heavy landing in the Powell Estate – the Tardis always landed there when the Doctor came to London – it was her favourite spot – it reminded her of Rose.

'Come on old girl' he told the Tardis 'you know better than to land here – she'll see us one day' he warned the ship who just moaned in return. He sighed as he scratched his head – he had no real reason to be here, he just always popped onto earth checking that no one was invading and everyone was safe – also just to be near her. He hated the way he had left things with Rose – despite being six years later it was still something that bothered him greatly. He'd had other companions after Rose but none of them were the same – no one was as fantastic as she was – and he'd never left any of them in the way he had left Rose. They had spent the night together after drinking heavily – a gift of Jerabka from the planet Jerab – neither of them had realised how strong the drink was until they woke up in bed together. They both pretended it never happened and carried on as normal until two weeks later – that was when Rose snapped. The Doctor didn't know why then and he still didn't know why now, all he knew was that he never should have shouted at her, he never should have made her cry. He'd lost his temper – something he rarely did – he'd challenged her to leave and she had accept it, never one to be outdone she packed her bags and ran out of the Tardis tears falling in her wake. He'd regretted it the moment he'd said it but he could tell from the look in her eyes that apologising was useless – that she really wouldn't be coming back, so he'd given her the note. It was a promise that he was certainly going to fulfil – he just didn't know when.

The Doctor moved to stand in front of a mirror – he was still in his tenth body – his brown hair still stood erratically from his head, his browns eyes were deepened with wisdom, lines nowmarked his face around his eyes and mouth – from pain and laughter. He's travel so far in these last six years but no where felt as quite like home as Earth did – it was the closest place he had to a home after the Tardis – a home he could hardly ever visit though in fear of meeting someone he'd been trying so desperately to avoid. He didn't know how he had managed to remain in the same body for all these years, somehow he seemed to be able to avoid death more often and it was becoming easier each time. He pulled at his skin noting how it was losing elasticity, also how he was starting to look older and more…. what was the word…. dignified? The Doctor stopped playing with his hair and took a deep breath in – he was just going to do what he always did when he came to Earth, have a wander around keeping his eyes pealed and avoiding Rose at all costs. He'd never seen her – from the moment she'd left he'd never seen her again – he didn't know if she even lived in London any more, if she was even alive. But he never gave up hope, just looking for one last glimpse of her to assure himself that he hadn't ruined her.

He pulled on his brown coat over his pin stripped suit – it looked exactly the same as the old suit he used to wear but it wasn't – he'd have to change it several times after holes and rips begun to appear in the seams. He fell into his coat relishing in the familiarity of it – he took a breath in and stepped out of the doors into London, England 2012. He took a deep breath in of the crisp October air, it had been a year since he'd last been here – it still looked exactly the same as in 2006, just a new coat of paint, new slabs of paving, new Prime Minster – all the little things had changed– all the big things remained the same. He stood outside the Tardis looking around at the grey concrete walls of the Powell Estate; he was staring at the crisp golden leaves that hung off the trees before they slowly drifted down to the floor making a pile for some deviant child to jump into. He was gazing at the trees and their colours when a suddenly splash of water shot all over his feet and trouser legs. He looked down and saw the remains of a water balloon in the puddle of water that soaked him, he looked up and saw a gang of small children standing about ten feet away all giggling

'Oi!' he shouted as he ran towards them, the children instantly scattered – one was trailing behind weighed down by water balloons. The Doctor reached the little girl and grabbed the back of her hood causing her to stop, she screamed and turned around to look at him – the moment he saw her he stepped back. There was something so familiar about her, the way her blonde curls fell down her face, the deep intense brown eyes that studied him cautiously – he could see the intelligence behind them, her face was that unusual shape which defined her jaw, she had a button nose and small ears. The girl studied him for a moment then smiled cautiously at him – it was her smile that struck him – it was so familiar, he could almost place his finger on who she reminded him of….almost.

A woman had heard the girls' screams and came running as soon as she saw a strange man talking to her daughter – from behind she could see a brown jacket blowing in the cool autumn wind. She ran towards the pair and came to a stop behind the man

'Oi, you sick pervert! Keep the hell away from my daughter' she shouted at him before he turned around.

The Doctor froze the moment he heard that voice – it was a voice he would recognise anywhere, his heart froze and his blood ran cold as he realised why the child look so familiar – who she looked like. He very slowly turned around to face her and sure enough it was Rose Tyler six years older.

Rose froze the moment the man turned around – there was no mistake about it – it was definitely the Doctor – and he had seen her daughter. Her mouth hung open and she couldn't breath she just stared at him as memories from six years ago flashed back in her mind. She pulled herself out of her daze and sharply commanded

'Venetia, come here right now' she told the little girl. Venetia looked up at her mother then to the strange man – she slowly walked over to her mother who instantly put her hands on her shoulders anchoring her in place – almost as though she was trying to hide behind her.

'Venetia' the Doctor said slowly feeling each decibel as he said it – he was testing the new word and found it flowed easily on his tongue, it was a name that he liked. The Doctor looked from the young girl to Rose and back, he didn't have any idea of what to say – luckily Venetia broke the ice.

'He wasn't hurting me mummy' the small voice called out trying to reassure her mother – she could feel the atmosphere. 'I dropped some water at his feet and was apologising' she told her mother her version of the truth. The Doctor grinned at the child, she reminded him of Rose or what she would have been like as a child.

'That's okay' she told the girl 'I just don't want you to speak to him anymore, okay?' she told her. Venetia shook her head in protest

'But mummy!' she began to whine

'That's enough' Rose cut her off staring sharply at her daughter. The Doctor looked at Rose – she had grown into a beautiful woman, but there was something that was bothering him – the little girls' eyes. They were the loveliest colour of brown, deep swirling pools of mysteries – but they conveyed so much intelligence and understanding – too much for a small child to have.

'Hi' he said gently with a small smile to Rose. She looked back at him, her eyes troubled, looking as though she might burst into tears.

'Hey' she gently replied – this was the first time she had spoken to him in six years.

The Doctor looked at the girl again – it was just those eyes…

'How old is she?' he asked curiously – Rose retaliated as though she had been kicked, her mouth tightly clamped shut. She moved as though she was about to leave

'I'm five and one quarter years old' Venetia called out proudly with a wide cherubic grin. The Doctor froze – that's why she looked so familiar, why those eyes haunted him, why Rose looked so scared.

'Is she-' the Doctor began; Rose cut him off with a nod before he fell into silence.

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	2. Part Two

Thank you everyone for your reviews!

I shortened the paragraphs – hope this is better!

Hope you continue to enjoy!

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A Recognised Loss

Part Two

The Doctor stared at the little girl in front of him – _his_ little girl, well that explained why her eyes looked so familiar – they were his eyes. He really didn't have a clue what to say, he was in shock – did Venetia even know he existed? Had Rose told her stories about him and their life together before… before she had been born?

Then it hit him – why Rose had been so upset that morning in the Tardis, why she had cried and looked at him with such uncertainly in her eyes, why she had shied away from his touch and fled when he spoke cruel words to her – she had found out she was pregnant. The Doctor stood there numbly for a moment not knowing what to say – all he could do was stare at the child, _their_ child, their beautiful daughter. Venetia looked up at the Doctor, her eyes wide and curious

'Mummy?' she asked quietly to Rose who looked down at her, 'Is he alright?' Rose took her daughters' small hand in hers and looked up at the Doctor

'I don't know' she quietly replied knowing what her words must have done to him. She looked at the Doctors eyes – she shivered seeing how incredibly similar they were to Venetia's, but his eyes were shadowed – lost deep in thought, he looked at her unsure of what to say. She took a deep breath in and knew most of this was her fault so she would have to take the first step – she held her hand out to him

'Do you wanna come in for coffee and talk?' she asked him meekly. He paused for a moment then pulled himself out of his thoughts, nodding slowly he said

'Yeah – I think that would be a good idea' The Doctor and Rose walked together, both of their hands by their sides warily watching one another whilst Venetia ran ahead.

'Put those water balloons down Vennie!' Rose briskly instructed as she ran down the pavement with her blonde curls bouncing wildly around her head

'Yes Mummy' she sang back as she threw the balloons at the other children waiting on the corner before running ahead squealing. Rose smiled proudly at her

'Vennie?' the Doctor asked curiously whilst trying to make conversation

'It's her nickname – its short for Venetia' she told him

'Venetia' he said again slowly as though he was still adjusting to the name 'Any reason why you picked that name?' he asked quietly. She seemed to pause then looked down at her hands to fumble with her coat button.

'It was strange, unusual and unheard of – it reminded me of you' she tried to joke whilst being brutally honest. He didn't know what to say to that so he changed to subject instead

'So do you still live in the same flat?' he asked

'Yep' she replied as they continued to follow Venetia

'Is there… anyone special in your life at the moment?' he awkwardly asked. She blushed at his question but shook her head

'No – just me and Vennie' she told him quietly

'Oh' he said nodding – secretly pleased. 'What about your mum, she still around?' he asked sounding genuinely scared. Rose paused for a moment and bit her lip as though she was going to cry

'No, she passed away a couple years back' she said quietly. The Doctor stopped walking and turned around to look at her, he awkwardly put his hand on her shoulder in a comforting gesture

'I'm sorry' he told her – she could tell it was really heartfelt. She nodded, biting back the tears

'It was cancer' she said after a short pause, her voice cracking 'Took her in the end – she fought so hard though, didn't deserve to… to die' she said before she let her tears fall. In a second the Doctor had wrapped her in his arms for a hug – just like the old days. She stood there for a moment in his embrace, her arms closing in around him savouring the feeling.

Venetia turned around, her curls bouncing all over the place as she paused for breathe from her running, she saw the strange man holding her mum as she shook, crying into the strangers arms. She slowly approached the pair watching them cautiously want to know who had upset her mum

'Mummy?' she quietly called out in a frightened little voice. Rose stepped back from the Doctors' arms and smiled reassuringly at her

'I'm fine sweetheart' she lied to her daughter. Venetia watched her studying her with her big brown eyes, she looked at the Doctor – he was doing the exactly same thing – it was eerie how similar they were Rose thought.

'Come on – we should get inside before it gets cold' she told the pair as she began to walk briskly ahead, the Doctor and Venetia both watched her before following. Rose wiped away her tears and took a deep breath in – she didn't have time to breakdown, especially not today of all days.

The threesome quickly approached the flat and stopped outside the door – it was getting darker as she evening drew in and a frost began to settle in the air. She fumbled through her pockets looking for her keys as she did this the Doctor and Venetia stood silently staring at each other.

'How do you know my mum?' Vennie asked as she assessed the Doctor – he was fairly sure that Rose hadn't told her anything about him

'I used to travel with your mother – a long time ago' he told her quietly as he remembered the old days.

'Before I was born?' she asked innocently, he suddenly straightened

'Yes' he simply replied.

'Did you stop travelling because I came along?' she asked yearning for information, the Doctor froze at this comment

'I don't know' he sadly replied as Rose bristled. She had opened the door

'In. Now.' she instructed Venetia who obliging followed. The little girl ran into the flat throwing her shoes and jacket off

'Wash up for dinner' Rose called out to her

'Yes Mummy' she sang back. Rose turned in the hallway and gestured to the Doctor to enter – he paused for a moment unsure. The moment he stepped over the threshold a thousand memories hit him at once, him and Rose in this flat, at Christmas with her mum – falling asleep together on the sofa after eating too much Christmas pudding. He tried to block the memories as he walked in looking around at how much the flat hadn't changed. The only thing that was different was the tiny pairs of shoes and abandoned Barbies that littered the place.

Rose hung her coat up and watched the Doctor until he did the same; he wandered into the living room and saw the photos that lined the mantelpiece. Photos of Rose pregnant, of Venetia being born, Venetia's first steps, her first day at school, her first Christmas and birthday – all the major milestones that the Doctor had missed out on – a cold rage swept through him. He had missed his beautiful little girl growing up and the knowledge ate away at him inside.

Rose threw some chips and nuggets into the oven and asked Venetia to sit in the kitchen watching the food whilst she spoke to the Doctor – Venetia agreed happily loving to play grown ups.

Rose walked into the living room and watch the Doctor touch each photo – burning these images of Venetia into his mind, she could feel the icy tension that laced the room. She knew the confrontation was coming – she had been preparing herself for it for the last six years – she just didn't know if she was ready – but then again, it wasn't as though she had any choice. The Doctor put the last of the photos down – it was taken on Venetia's third birthday, it was Rose, Jackie and Venetia – the three generations of Tylers – all looking so happy, looking at that photo you would never have known of the secrets that lay within the family.

The Doctor turned to look at her, his eyes dark and angry – also a little bit hurt, she stood anxiously, her hands twisted behind her back and biting her lip.

'Why?' he asked – he walked up to her until he was standing eye to eye with her, he could see the fear, and sadness and even desperation that laced her eyes. She held her breath as he said it again

'Why?' that simple word asked a million questions, all questions that she didn't know if she could answer. She chewed her fingernail as she wondered what to reply – which 'why'sheshould she reply to.

'Why what?' she weakly asked. She could see the anger blaze in his eyes as he listened to her

'Why… why did you leave?' he finally exclaimed. She was sick of him glaring at her, she could give as good as she got

'Because you threw me out – do you remember that?' she testily replied, when he winced she could tell that he did. 'Do you remember the words you said?' she began

'Rose…' he began not wanted to drag it up, she glared at him

'I bet you can't – well I can. I remembered those words when I sat alone out in the dark, alone and _pregnant_' she shouted at him waving her arms in the air in dramatic gestures.

'How the hell should I have known!' he yelled back 'You never told me!'

She seemed to jump at his tone – as though she hadn't been shouted at in a long time

'You just… should have' she whispered quietly – she blinked back her tears as her rage returned to her

'I remember what you said – you said "Well Miss Tyler, if I'm that terrible and such a horrific person as you tell me I am, why don't you go the hell home?" do you remember shouting that in my face? Do you remember me falling back against the wall wiping away my tears?' she asked him hurting

He sighed angrily

'Do you remember shouting "I wouldn't stay here if you paid me – get me the hell out of this place?"' he asked bitterly, his voice just below the shouting level.

'I was pregnant I was allowed to be upset!' she screamed back at him as hot tears fell down her face burning her – she had sworn to herself she wouldn't cry over him, not any more, yet here she was. She angrily wiped the tears away

'You – Never – Told –Me' he spaced out with a voice fuelled by emotions. She swirled around and walked up to his face

'How could I? You threw me out and disappeared' she whispered. She lent back against a wall and let the sobs ride through her soul; the Doctor ran his fingers through his hair trying to regain the leash on his anger.

'Rose' he warned darkly, her eyes shot up to meet his

'Don't' she warned him.

'You never told me' he repeated quietly as though he still couldn't believe it

'What was I supposed to do? Send a postcard?' she asked crying, hers eyes streamed as did her nose each tear drop creating a tiny pool on her top. 'I couldn't get hold of you' she whispered the heartbreaking truth. The Doctor stepped back realising this couldn't all be her fault – he was partly to blame

'Damn it' he muttered. He glanced up to the doorway to see Venetia standing there with her hands on her hips, tears streamed down her face and fear heightened her features but she was going to protect her mother – she was hell bent on that.

'Mummy?' the innocent voice called out between sobs.

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	3. Part Three

Thank you so much everyone for reviewing! I hope you continue to like.

* * *

A Recognised Loss

Part Three

Venetia Tyler stood at the doorway, she could feel her hands shaking and her heart pounding, her breathing was rapid and irregular due to her sobs but that wasn't going to stop her.

'Stop it!' she begged, the voice of a little girl calling out into the argument. That voice called out to the Doctor causing him to look up at her – she was so brave, so strong willed, so protective… just like her mother. The Doctor felt his hearts break as he watched Venetia stand in the doorway shaking as she tried to protect her mother from the monster in the room – it hurt the Doctor deeply to be thought of as a monster…especially by his own daughter. _Daughter _– the word still shocked him – that he had a child.

Both adults fell silent at the sight of the hysterical child, Rose wiped the tears from her face then slowly walked over to where Venetia stood, she gently wrapped her arms around the small child and held her to her as she soothed her. She stood up as Venetia threw her arms around Roses' neck and wrapped her legs around her waist – Rose hugged her tightly as the little girl sobbed into her mothers' neck. Rose slowly rocked her daughter as she sung lullabies into her hair – the Doctors' heart stopped and filled with pain and grief as he saw the family he could never have – as he saw how he upset them. He turned and walked out of the living room pulling his jacket on as he left. Rose stared at him as he walked out on her again – only she couldn't let him do it this time – she knew if he walked out that door he would disappear into time and space. She followed him out of the front door her bare feet cold against the wet concrete slabs of the landing

'Wait!' she called out into the darkness. The sound of footsteps came to a stop as her shout echoed off the walls of the estate.

'Please don't go' she asked. This stopped the Doctor – she sounded exactly like she did when she was nineteen years old and carefree – there was something about her that called out to him. He slowly turned around and walked up the steps until he was near enough to see her eyes – they were wide in the dark and filled with unshed tears, but something else was there – the determination she had always shown. A ghost of a smile took over his lips as he watched her so proud and so protective – an exact copy of the little girl she held in her arms. Venetia had stopped crying and now poked her head over Roses' shoulder watching the Doctor warily; she didn't know what to make of him. He smiled gently at her almost as though he was trying to reassure her that he wasn't going to hurt her. Rose stood on the landing for a moment then briefly smiled

'Come on – before the chips burn' she told the pair as she walked inside, the Doctor followed her and stopped in front of her as he stopped to remove his jacket again. He smiled softly at her

'I'm sorry for shouting and for scaring you' he said to them both, Venetia looked at him, her brown eyes wide and still unsure, he could see the shadows that hung in the back of her eyes. She blinked several times until the shadows were pushed far back into her mind – Rose carefully put her on the floor then knelt in front of her. She stroked a blonde curl of her hair and tucked it behind her ear, then gently wiped a tear away

'You gunna be alright?' she softly asked Venetia, the little girl looked from one adult to the next then smiled brightly as she nodded. She stroked her hair

'Good girl' she praised her as she pressed a kiss to her forehead

'I love you' she whispered to her as she directed her to the kitchen

'Not as much as I love you!' Venetia called back as she ran into the kitchen to pull out the plates and cutlery.

Rose straightened and looked at the Doctor,

'I'm sorry' she told him with a small smile

'So am I' he told her

'We'll talk soon?' she asked hopefully, he nodded at her in return.

'Good. So you staying for dinner?' she asked grinning at him, he smiled back that old familiar smile that made Rose remember the past like it was yesterday

'Depends – what we having?' he asked his eyes twinkling

'Nuggets and chips' she offered with a smile

'How could I refuse?' he asked enjoying their moment together.

'Mummy!' a voice called out from the kitchen 'The food's ready!'

'Coming!' Rose called back; she grabbed the Doctors' hand and pulled him into the kitchen with her

'Prepared to do domestic?' she teased as she threw the plates at him. He grinned back and started to dish out food.

Half an hour later all the food was gone and the Tyler family sat around the table satisfied. The Doctor and Rose smiled happily at one another from across the table as did Venetia who was lapping up the atmosphere.

'Right missy – time for bed' she told Venetia who immediately protested.

'Oh – but Mummy! I'm not even tired!' she began to whine. Rose shook her head and picked up the little girl.

'Bed time – no arguments' she told her as she carried her down the hallways.

'But Mummy!' she continued to protest

'It's time to go to beddy-byes Vennie' Rose softly sang as she dropped her daughter onto her bed.

The Doctor slowly smiled at the family scene played out in front of him – he could never imagine himself becoming a part of that but it was still amazing to watch. He slowly began to clear away the dishes as Rose sang their daughter to sleep – their daughter – he just couldn't get his head round the fact that the amazing, beautiful, clever little girl was theirs. He finished cleaning the dishes and walked along the hallway stopping outside what had once been Roses' room – it now had a pink sign on it saying _Venetia's Room_. He strained his ears and could hear the soft sounds of Roses' voice floating through the doorway

'The spring has sprung, the grass is rizz. I wonder where them birdies is' she read out. The Doctor smiled to himself as the familiar words of Winnie the Pooh filled the air.

When Venetia was asleep Rose came into the living room to join the Doctor on the sofa

'Sorry – she wouldn't go to sleep until she had heard the end of the story. Winnie the Pooh – it's her favourite, makes me read it over and over again' Rose said with a smile.

'She knows all the words but still insists that I read it' Rose told him, the Doctor smiled

'Maybe she just wants to hear your voice' he suggested. Rose paused – she had never thought of that. The Doctor and Rose smiled at each other for a moment before the Doctor knew he had to initiate the conversation.

'Have you told her about me?' he asked carefully

'What that you're her father? No. She doesn't know anything about her father just what she heard when she was little and I spoke about you with mum' Rose told him. The Doctor nodded slowly

'So who are you going to tell her I am?' he asked awkwardly. Rose stared at her hands for a moment then looked up to meet his unwavering gaze

'I'm going to tell her the truth – I think we owe her that much' Rose decided. The Doctor nodded slowly. Rose shivered suddenly and the Doctor moved next to her – he pulled her close and put an arm around her. They sat like they used to – her head tucked under his chin whilst he had his arm protectively curled around her.

'Tell me about her' the Doctor asked quietly. Rose stopped to think

'What do you want to know?' she asked. He smiled at her and stoked her arm

'Everything' Rose had to smile at that.

'Well she's incredibly intelligent, top of her class in everything. She loves science with a passion and history, she is an avid reader and her favourite books are all the Winnie the Pooh ones. Her favourite colour is pink; when she grows up she wants to be an astronomer - she loves gazing at the stars.' she told him proudly, she smiled sweetly 'She takes after her father' she told him. This lit up the Doctors' face like nothing else could.

The Doctor squeezed Roses' hand

'Tell me more' he asked

'Well-' Rose began as she stopped to think 'She always says what's on her mind, she is very determined, has an opinion on everything and is never afraid to stand up for what she believes in'

The Doctor grinned at Rose

'So she's quite like her mother as well then?' he exclaimed. They both laughed then stopped to think of Venetia. They were both so incredibly proud of her – just for existing.

A few hours later Rose had fallen asleep in the Doctors' arms – this had been a regular occurrence in the past – but they were in the present now. The Doctor made to move her to her own room but instead she snuggled against him

'Don't' she whispered as she pulled the blanket down from the back of the sofa to cover them. The Doctor smiled and tucked them in, obligingly cuddling up to her feeling something he thought he had lost six years ago – he felt love.

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	4. Part Four

:-) I'm so glad you are all liking! Thank you for reviewing!

* * *

A Recognised Loss

Part 4

Venetia stood sleepily in the doorway of the living room, she held her Winnie the Pooh teddy under her arm which matched the prints on her flannel pyjamas, her blonde curls were in a tangled mess on her head. She rubbed her eyes as she looked in the living room – she had woken up early and wanted to watch her Winnie the Pooh DVDs but what she saw stopped her.

On the sofa under a green blanket the strange man lay sprawled out, his head rested on a stack of pillows and his feet hung over the end of the sofa, his long toes poking out of a hole in his sock. His arms lay tightly around Rose whose head was tucked under his chin, her blonde hair lay over his shoulder, she was holding his arms and underneath the blanked his legs were entwined with hers. Venetia didn't know what to do, she could tell there was something between her mum and this man that she didn't know. She was intrigued by this man who made her mum so happy – she knew he wouldn't stay long, the never did – but she wanted her mum to remember this moment. She glanced around the room until she finally saw the camera; she picked it up and took a shot of the pair with alarming accuracy. She smiled to herself as she put the camera down, she then walked to the end of the sofa where the Doctors' toe stuck out, she giggled into her hand then fell to the floor.

She lifted one of her small fingers and gently tickled his toe – the Doctors' foot twitched as he mumbled something incoherent. Venetia giggled innocently as she raised her hand to tickle him again – the Doctors' foot twitched more violently as he began to awaken. The Doctor slowly opened his eyes and the first thing he felt was Roses' body on his, the next thing he noticed was the small head poking over the edge of the sofa – wild blonde curls had been pushed back, her cherubic grin took over her face and her large brown eyes twinkled innocently. The Doctor met Venetias' eyes and opened his mouth to say something – she ducked down behind the sofa hiding but her angelic laughter filled the air – there was nothing he could do but join her.

Rose was jolted awaked as the sound of laughter surrounded her – the sound of a child and a man – a man whose laughter she hadn't heard in years. Rose slowly opened her eyes as she remembered the last day – he was really here, and he was holding her. Rose looked around to see the same sparkle lighting up the Doctor and Venetias' eyes. Rose looked between the pair for a moment sleepily then sighed

'What time is it?' she mumbled as she began to realise she was curled up with the Doctor. A blush began to take over her cheeks as she sat up – moving away from him. He realised he was still holding her tightly so he removed his hands with a small smile allowing her to get up. Rose looked at the little girl who was grinning at her expectantly, she frowned at her

'What?' she asked tiredly. Venetia shook her head before grinning at the pair and running into the kitchen.

'Kids' Rose sighed as she shook out her hair – the Doctor turned to a sitting position ignoring the pain in his neck from spending all night on the sofa, Rose stood in front of him and rubbed her eyes.

'Right' she said 'Breakfast, shower – then we can tell her today' Rose informed him, the Doctor nodded slowly

'What about school?' he asked, she looked at him expectantly then smiled

'It half term' she gently told him, he nodded feeling stupid for not knowing little things like that.

'Don't worry' she reassured him as she began to walk to the bathroom.

'How could I not?' he asked himself as he scratched his head, he looked up to see Venetia grinning at him from the doorway – he smiled back slightly unsure. He didn't know if he could tell her the truth, if she knew he was her father then would she hate him for not being here the last six years? Would he disappoint her time and time again so much that she wished she had never found out? Would he be able to walk away from those big brown eyes and disappear in the Tardis? Would he be able to handle the day an enemy found out she existed and used her against him?

So many questions haunted him, telling him to walk away but then he remembered what it felt like to see your entire family die, to have no one in the world that loves you, and did he want that for her? Could he leave the little girl that looked at him with such expectancy? Could he leave the child who reminded him so much of Rose and what they once had? The Doctor knew that he couldn't answer any of these questions himself – there was only one person who could, and she was smiling at him – it was in that moment he knew he would do anything and kill anyone to protect her.

Several hours later the Doctor sat nervously in the living room, he was wearing his pin strip suit and had attempted to flatten his hair – an attempt that had failed miserably as it stood erratically in the air. Rose walked in the room wearing jeans and a t-shirt showing off her figure, her hair was pulled back off her face and she smiled encouragingly at the Doctor. Lastly Venetia walked in clutching her Winnie the Pooh, she had her blonde hair in pig tails with a few loose curls hanging out, she had a pink dress on with white tights, the little pink bows in her hair matched – she looked like she'd walked straight out of a fairy tale. The Doctors' face lit up when he saw her; she returned his smile then walked up to him

'I'd like you to meet Winnie – he's my bestest friend' she told the Doctor. The Doctor stuck his hand out to the stuffed animal who shook it back with help from Venetia.

'Pleasure to meet you Winnie' he told the bear. 'I'm…' he began before looking to Rose for confirmation – she just nodded in return.

'I'm the Doctor – a friend of young Vennie' he told the bear hopefully. Venetia watched him for a moment then gave him a blinding grin – on that reminded him of himself on occasion. Rose smiled at the pair then walked over to join the Doctor on the soda – the parents both sat looking at their daughter who stood in front of them – neither of them knowing how to beginning.

'The Doctor?' Venetia asked 'That's a strange name' she told him. The Doctor just nodded in return

'He's an unusual man' Rose told her quietly. Venetia looked at Rose then back to the Doctor

'Where did it come from?' she asked curiously

'I don't know really' he said shrugging 'I've just always been the Doctor' he stopped to think for a moment – then he smiled at her

'Where did your name come from? It's not a very common name' he told her. Venetia grinned proudly

'Mummy picked it because she said it reminded her of my Daddy' she told him happily. Rose began to chew her lip nervously and the Doctor watched the girls' happy expression as she spoke of her father

Venetia lowered her voice to a whisper and walked up to the Doctors' ear, she put her hand in front of her mouth trying to protect her secrets.

'Once I heard my Mummy talking to Grandma about him – Grandma didn't like him but my Mummy loved him – I heard her tell her. Grandma said she was de…de..louded?' she stumbled on her excitement

'Deluded?' the Doctor corrected her, Venetia nodded enthusiastically before she continued her story

'She said that all the talk of touching the stars and travelling in time had messed up her heart and now it was really broken' The Doctor felt a sharp pain in his hearts as her words sunk in

'But Mummy never listened to her – she would just nod and smile, I can tell she still loves him – she gets this look in her eyes when she talks about him' Venetia told him proud of herself for remembering so much, then she stopped a bit confused 'It's a bit like the way she looks at you' she finally whispered. Rose froze – her daughter was every bit as perceptive and clever as her father was.

Rose moved on the sofa breaking the atmosphere that had settled over the room – Rose could feel her hands shaking.

'Sweetheart, there's something I need to tell you' she told Venetia – her voice shaking. Venetia stepped away from the Doctor and looked at her mother – sometimes the intensity of Venetias' eyes could really scare Rose. She took a deep breath in

'It's about your father… and the Doctor' Rose began unsure of how to proceed. The Doctor seemed to tense as well and Venetia looked at both of them, her eyes deep in thought and slightly confused.

Rose took a deep, steadying breath in before taking her daughters' hand in hers and the Doctors' in her other hand.

'Vennie – the Doctor _is_ your father'

* * *

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	5. Part Five

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Tee-hee, sorry about the cliff hanger!

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* * *

A Recognised Loss

Part Five

Rose and the Doctor both held their breath as they watched Venetia react to this news. The little girl stood there silent for a moment, not moving nor blinking – her eyes lost deep in thought. Rose and the Doctor tensely gripped each others hands as they waited for her reaction – it felt like they had been waiting forever when she finally moved. Her wide brown eyes looked at him with all the sadness of the world

'Didn't you love me?' the tiny voice asked, all of the fears that she had been trying to hide showed in her eyes. She looked so small, so terribly confused and frightened. The Doctors' mouth dropped as did Roses'

'Why do you say that?' he asked softly, kneeling to be at eye level with her. Her brown eyes filling with tears as her lower lip trembled

'B'cos you avoided me for 5 and a quarter years' she whispered as small hot tears began to splash down her face. Seeing her like this broke the Doctors' hearts in a way he didn't know possible. He gently wiped her tears away using the back of his thumb

'I haven't been avoiding you' he softly told her. She stared hardly at him

'Then why didn't you ever come?' she whispered, her voice cracking 'I always wished you would – on every birthday cake, to every fairy, with every smile, on every star– I wished my Daddy could be here to hold my hand' she told him as she began to cry freely.

Rose was frozen in her spot as tears began to roll down her cheeks at the pain she hadn't realised her daughter was going through.

The Doctor reached forward and took Venetias' small hand in-between his own, he looked into her eyes and gave her a small reassuring smile

'I'm here now' he promised her, she looked at him not knowing whether she should believe him or not.

'Why didn't you ever come?' she asked sounding so incredibly lonely. The Doctor paused as he tried to think of what to say – he squeezed her hand

'Because I was very, very far away and it took a long, long time for the fairies to find me and tell me that you needed me' he softly told her with a placating smile. She bit her lip and looked up at him from underneath her lashes

'Why didn't you just know? Mummy knows when I'm upset and I know when she's upset – you should have known' she accused him quietly. The Doctor tried to block out the pain he could feel coming from his daughter

'It wasn't that simple Vennie' he began to tell her as he watched her eyes – they showed so much about her and her emotions 'I didn't know you had been born so I didn't know I had a wonderful, beautiful little girl waiting for me. If I had known I would have been here from the moment you were born and every single time you needed me I would have been there to hold you and protect you. But I didn't know – not until the fairies you asked came and found me and told me the best news I've ever heard' he reassured her whilst he wiped her tears away. Vennie frowned as she bit her bottom lip

'Really?' she slowly asked wanting to believe what he was telling her. He smiled at her his slow gentle grin that conveyed all the love in the world

'Yes' he told her. She returned his smile

'So the fairies listened and brought me my Daddy' she whispered as she grinned manically – she threw her arms around his neck and he held her close.

Venetia had been waiting her whole life just to be held in the warm, safe embrace of her father – and it was exactly everything she had dreamed it to be. She buried her face in the crook of his neck letting her tears dry in his suit; he rested his chin on her shoulder and closed his eyes to all the pain she had just revealed.

The Doctor had been countless places and experienced millions of things but nothing compared to the feeling of holding his daughter in his arms for the first time – the overwhelming rush of love that filled his soul warming every cell of his being.

Rose sat on the edge of the sofa her hands firmly clamped over her mouth as tremors shook her body; tears fell down her face and soaked her clothes. It was a moment she had been anticipating and dreading for the last six years – the moment when the Doctor could finally hold his daughter in his arms – and watching them unite filled her heart with happiness. They just looked so perfect together – there was nothing she could do but grin – yet her tears continued to fall for all the things Venetia had admitted. They were all things that Rose had remembered feeling as a child with no father – she just never thought that Venetia was going through the same thing – she always looked so happy.

'Daddy' she whispered 'I'd gaze at the stars for hours searching for a shooting star to wish upon so it could bring you home' she whispered into his shoulder.

Roses' heart shattered – all those time Venetia would lay staring at the stars, the countless number of hours she had spent outside just watching – her brown eyes so wide and hopeful – and she would always come in looking slightly disappointed but prepared to try again. All these things that Rose had missed, all the things that had worried her little girl and caused her to cry alone into a pillow at night time - all these things that made Rose feel like a terrible mother.

The Doctor froze as she called him 'Daddy' for the first time – no one had ever called him that before. He held her tighter as he realised what it would do to him if he ever lost her

'My daughter' he whispered as though he still didn't believe it. They stood that way for some time just clinging to each other – lost things being found.

When Rose had finally managed to stop crying she stood up to find the tissue box – instead she found the camera lying abandoned on the counter. She knew there would never be another moment like this so she couldn't let it pass forgotten – despite the fact that she was sure no-one could possibly forget this moment.

'Smile' Rose weakly called out. Venetia turned around in the Doctors' arms; she wiped her tears away and stood beside him. He had his arms wrapped around her and she held onto his hands, they both beamed the same smile at the camera lost in the happiness they had just found.

Venetia turned around to look at her father

'So_, Daddy_, what do you want to do today?' she asked grinning with a huge empathises on the name.

'Well, _daughter_' he replied with the same empathises 'Why don't you show me some of these stars you gaze upon?' he asked gesturing out the window. The sun had quickly sunk away to reveal a sky full of shinning beautiful lights just waiting to be discovered. Venetia grinned and grabbed his hand prepared to pull him out the door

'Make sure you wrap up!' she called from behind them. The Doctor turned and grinned at Rose as he pulled his coat on – she smiled back.

Rose watched from the window as Venetia lead the Doctor to a patch of grass near the playground – he spread out the blanket on the floor to protect her from the chill of the ground. They both lay on their backs disappearing into the darkness of the night sky and the millions of marvels that lit up the sky.

'Which stars can you name?' he asked her as she grinned

'Quite a lot – I've been learning their names whilst I'm supposed to be sleeping' she whispered to him, telling her secrets. The Doctor smiled proudly at her before he pointed into the sky

'Tell me the name of that one then' he challenged her – she grinned back

'That is Orion' the little girl began to recite showing knowledge well beyond her years, 'Orion was an ancient Greek hunter and warrior. Orion has more bright stars than any other constellation; the two brightest are Betelguese and Rigel' she proudly told him – all he could do in reply was applaud his intelligent child.

* * *

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	6. Part Six

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* * *

A Recognised Loss

Part Six

Rose stood at the window of her flat; she lent forward leaning her forehead on the glass of the window as she watched the Doctor and Venetia lying in the grass. Every now and then one of them would raise a hand and point into the sky at another star, they would talk quietly and then a rupture of laughter would break the silence of the night sky. Rose stood with her forehead pressed to the glass as silent tears begun to trickle down her cheeks, then she let out a tortured whisper for only her to hear

'I'm so sorry' she told her little girl as sobs began to choke her and tear at her soul. She managed to pull herself away from the window and lean back against the wall, she slowly slid down it, her head falling into her hands as her body shook with the force of emotion that was riding through her.

'I'm a failure' she whispered to herself, her voice cracking as she remembered the pain her daughter had revealed – a pain that she had never known of – a pain that was far too familiar. She'd failed her daughter – that was the simple truth of the matter, her daughter had been alone, crying into her pillow, praying for her father whilst Rose sat in the living room eating chips thinking about how happy they were. She just didn't know how she could be so deluded – she'd seen that look in her daughters' eyes, that little bit of fear and loneliness hanging the back of her eyes – she'd just never thought anything of it – that was until now.

Rose stood up and walked over to the window to watch them walking back inside, they walked hand in hand their arms swinging high and wildly as Venetias' giggles filled the air shortly joined by the Doctors laughter .The grin that was on Venetias' face was so strong it almost over took Rose – she didn't remember ever seeing her daughter looking so happy – and it stabbed at her heart like a knife.

Rose wiped away her tears as she heard the front door open – she couldn't let Venetia see her like this – she couldn't know the impact her words had upon her. Rose wiped her face but remained in the living room out of sight

'Time to go to bed' she called out in what she hoped was a normal voice – only it wasn't, the Doctor could hear the strain on it as could Venetia. The Doctor sent Venetia into her room to change for bed and the Doctor walked into the living room to see Rose. She stood there, her fair skin marked by red blotches and dried tears, she sniffled and smiled at him – it was her brave smile, he could still recognise that. He slowly walked up to her and gently traced the journey of one of her tears with his finger, the soft touch of his skin made her shiver

'Thank you' he whispered to her 'Thank you for giving me this chance'

She just gave him a half smile, he smiled gently at her before pulling her into his arms for the hug she so obviously needed. Rose clutched at him, burying her head in his neck, her sobs coming back to her every bit as aggressive as before, he gently rubbed her back trying to soothe her

'It's okay' he murmured into her hair as she gently shook in his arms, her breathing was becoming rapid and shallow, he could feel the pain radiating out of her. He gently rocked her as she cried, holding her close trying to warm her with the love in his heart

'I've got you' he promised her, they stood that way for several minutes as Rose began to calm down

'Daddy?' a small voice called out from the hallway. Roses' head snapped up, her broken eyes meeting the Doctors' worried ones.

'Go' she gently told him as she untangled herself from his embrace. He stroked a piece of hair away from her face

'But-' he began, knowing how upset she was

'Please' she begged, her face breaking everything inside of him. He slowly nodded and began to move away from her – first he pressed a kiss to her forehead

'I'll be back soon' he promised her, she just nodded in return 'Then we can talk hmm?' he gently asked her. She nodded and tried to smile as he left the room.

Rose fell heavily into the sofa, closing her eyes to all the pain and memories that were running through her mind.

In Venetias' room the Doctor had tucked Venetia into her bed and sat on the edge holding a story book in his lap.

'Read to me please' she begged him, her eyes bright and hopeful. He smiled down at her and knew in that moment he would never be able to say no to her. He began to read her Winnie the Pooh as her eyelids fell heavy with sleep; she was barely keeping them open to watch the Doctor as he read to her

'If ever there is a tomorrow when we're not together, there is something you must always remember' the Doctors' voice became softer as the words of the story became reality, 'You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think – but the most important thing is, even when we're apart, I'll always be with you'

'I'll always be with you Daddy' she promised sleepily, as her eyes began to close

'And I'll always be with you' he whispered to his sleeping daughter. He watched her for a moment then slowly stood up; he put the book on her cabinet and pulled the blankets up around her chin. He lent forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead

'Sweet dreams' he wished her as he began to quietly walk out of the room. Outside of her door the Doctor stopped to think of how true the words he had read to her were – he'd always be with her in her heart, and her in his.

The Doctor slowly walked into the living room to see Rose lying on the sofa, she had closed her eyes and rested her head on the arm of the sofa. He could tell she wasn't sleeping by the sniffles and jerks that her body gave – she slowly opened one eye

'Hey' she whispered with a small smile.

'Hi' he replied as he returned her smile. He walked over to the sofa and sat down after Rose moved into a sitting position – her eyes were wide and troubled.

'What's the matter?' he gently asked her. She paused as though she didn't know what to say, then she bit her lower lip as her shoulders began to tremble. The Doctor moved closer to her and put an arm on her shoulders

'I'm a terrible mother' she whispered heartbroken, she felt that in saying the words they were become true all over again, her eyes began to well as her tears were ready of overflow. The Doctor pulled her against his chest

'No you're not!' he told her confidently

'But I am' she said trying to convince him 'You heard her – she's been so alone, so afraid and I didn't even notice' she whimpered. The Doctor gently stroked her cheek wiping away her tears

'Do you remember being five?' he asked her softly, Rose looked confused but nodded.

'Do you remember missing your Dad and crying over him?' he continued reasoning, Rose nodded again

'And do you remember hating your Mum for it?' he asked. She shook her head at him, he slowly smiled

'See you haven't failed her' he reassured her 'If anyone has it's me for not being here' Rose paused thinking then shook her head at him

'Don't blame yourself' she whispered, pleading him

'Only if you don't blame yourself' he compromised

'But-' she began, he shook his head cutting her off.

'You're a great mother – a fantastic mother' he told her truthfully, she blinked at him unsure

'When she's all grown up and looking back on her childhood she will thank you for it' he promised her. She blinked way her tears and gave him a small smile

'You think?' she asked. He beamed at her

'Yes! And when she's nineteen years old and brings home a nine hundred year alien you will be the best, most understanding mother in the world!' he joked with her – his heart lit up when he saw her smile

'Or I could slap him' she giggled. The Doctor shuddered at the memory of a Tyler slap

'Don't remind me. I had a hand print on my face for days after that!' he recalled in horror, a smile tugging at his lips. She giggled with him for a moment then fell back against his chest as he held her close

'Thank you' she whispered, he wrapped his arms around her and grinned back

'Any time' he promised.

* * *

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	7. Part Seven

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* * *

A Recognised Loss 

Part Seven 

The Doctor woke early excited about the day to come, this would be his third day with his daughter and he was looking forward to every moment he could spend with her, learning about her, finding little traits that reminded him of Rose and himself – he couldn't wait to just see her smile. The Doctor got up off of the sofa and wandered over to the window; he pulled the curtains back and looked up at the night sky. He looked out knowing of all the thousands of planets and galaxies that he hadn't explored yet – so many things he hadn't seen yet – he yearned to travel, to see everything, he loved the feeling he got every time he walked out of the Tardis doors and into a new dimension. Then he remembered the feeling that came over him every time he saw Venetia – he knew he was going to have to make a momentous decision. Did he stay with Venetia or did he return to the Tardis?

The Doctor pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind – they were thoughts he couldn't deal with right now – thoughts he didn't know the answer to – thoughts that would change his entire future. He lent forward against the window in the same spot Rose had yesterday night; he was deeply troubled and didn't know what to do. He was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard footsteps behind him

'Hey' Rose softly called out 'You alright?' she asked coming up behind him and placing her hand on his arm. He paused then turned around to look at her, he gave her a reassuring smile

'I'm fine' he told her – he knew he couldn't talk to her about the future, not yet, not until he had decided what he was going to do.

'Why you up so early?' he asked her curiously. She shrugged

'Couldn't sleep' he nodded then put his arm around her shoulder pulling her close.

'It's beautiful isn't it' Rose murmured as they watched the sun begin to rise over London shedding its' amber light over the grey buildings of the city. When the Doctor didn't reply Rose smile to herself knowingly

'I suppose it's not that beautiful when you've seen the four suns of Gerbratar rising over the tropical oasis' she recalled smiling at the memory. The Doctor smiled down at Rose looking her in the eye

'You should never knock the beauty of Earth – it still gets me every time' he told her wistfully 'There's just so much here waiting to be seen and explored, so many wonders and magnificent things' Rose smiled at his musing

'Well you know what they say – home is where the heart is' she joked. He grinned at her, his familiar quirky smile and pulled her closer. They stood that way for a while watching the moon fade away and the sun begin to brighten the sky taking its' place. The Doctor moved so that he was standing behind Rose, his head poking over her shoulder, his hands wrapped around her stomach from behind.

'How was the pregnancy?' he quietly asked touching her stomach as if Vennie was still in there. Rose seemed to stiffen at the question then sighed leaning back into the Doctor

'It was terrible' she whispered as she recalled the hardest nine months of her life.

She was now holding his hands as they were wrapped around her, he gently stroked one of her hands with the back of his thumb.

'What happened?' he tenderly asked. Rose looked down at the floor

'I was so scared' she whispered 'I didn't know if she was like me or like you – I was scared if I went for a scan or anything they'd think she was some sort of freak or deformity and try to take her away' she told him, her voice cracking as she remembered the days of holding her bump but being so afraid.

'What did you do?' he prodded her, she sighed and looked up out of the window at the fresh day that was dawning

'Well I kept getting these pains in my stomach – sharp stabbing pains. I didn't know what was happening – if something was wrong. Mum convinced me to go in the end; waiting for the image to come up on the screen was the worst moment of my life. Just waiting to see what kind of child I'd have. Mum sat their holding my hand telling me everything was gunna be okay, but it wasn't the same' she sadly told him as the old memories brought back the same fears and horrors she had felt then. The Doctor wasn't prepared for the rush of guilt that soared through him as she told him of all her fears and worries that had been caused by him – all questions that he could have answered so easily if he had been there. But he hadn't been there – so Rose had to go through all of this alone - the Doctor winced. He didn't say anything; he just waited for her to finish her story when she was ready.

'I remember looking at the screen, them pointing out the tiny dot that was my baby. I swear I'd never seen anything like it before. When she was born, she had an abscess beside her left lung – they let me hold her then rushed her off to surgery. It was her second heart – it never grew, it just sorta stayed there' she quietly told him

'They cut out her second heart?' he asked, slightly shocked and perplexed. Rose shook her head

'They tried – but they couldn't. It had its own blood supply, arties and stuff, they said if they tried to remove it that it could kill her. They wanted to try again when she was older but I wouldn't let them. Mum wanted them to, she said she didn't see why Vennie had to be a two hearted freak just because her father was – mum started to hate you when she found out I was pregnant – she never forgave you' Rose quickly explained before continuing.

'But I couldn't let them do that to her, I couldn't let them give away something so special that only one other person in existence has – I wanted her to be her fathers' daughter' she told the Doctor simply. The Doctor beamed the moment she said that

'Thank you' he told her as he squeezed her, he pressed a kiss to her cheek in gratitude.

'So that's Vennie: half human, half Gallifreyan' Rose mused

'But just perfect' the Doctor finished. Rose lent her head back against his chest and smiled up at him

'Part Time Lord?' she asked curiously – she had always wondered but never known. Vennie had always been clever, one of those kids who could talk by the age of one, could memorise entire books, she was top of the class in everything and they had even talked of moving her up a year. Some of these things had shocked Rose and made her want to know more, to test her daughter but she knew that no matter how much intelligence Vennie showed, how much wisdom she conveyed and however many stars she could name she was still only a kid.

The Doctor moved his head so his chin rested on top of Roses' head, he looked out at the beautiful day with her, he moved his hands to her hips and her hands followed holding onto his

'I'm not sure…' he contemplated, he knew there would only be one way to know for sure and that was to run some tests using the Tardis – but he didn't want to do that. Determine the fate of a little girl, telling her she would live forever and be trapped alone or that she would surely die as did her Grandma and as her mother will. Rose thought for a moment to – she knew what the Doctor had been through, how hard his life was, and the thought of her daughter changing bodies and faces unsettled her. Rose shook her head

'I don't want to know' she decided, telling the Doctor 'Well not yet at least' she finished. He nodded

'I agree' he turned her around so that she was facing him now, his hands moved onto her cheeks as he looked into her hazel eyes – eyes that he could drown in.

'Oh Rose' he whispered 'I never stopped loving you – you know that right?' he asked her quietly. Her eyes widened then she smiled a slow understanding smile

'There've been moments where I've doubted it but…I never stopped loving you either' she told him sadly. He smiled at her

'Good' he teased before he pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Vennie ran in having risen with the sun – she screwed her face up atthe grown ups then giggled. She snuck over to where the camera was and picked it up, she turned around and shouted

'Say cheese!' they both looked at her and grinned. It was a beautiful photo, the Doctor and Rose looked so lost in each others arms and the rising sun in the background illuminated them like nothing else could.

* * *

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	8. Part Eight

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* * *

A Recognised Loss

Part 8

Several hours later the Doctor, Rose and their daughter sat on a checked picnic blanket in a nearby field. It had been Venetias' idea to go for a picnic; everyone had instantly agreed and rushed out to buy party eggs and sausage rolls. All the food had been eaten and the sun was high – unusually warm for an October afternoon. They still wore their jackets but the sun warmed them, Venetia lay in between her parents having a nap; the excitement of the day had worn her out. The Doctor was lying on the blanket perched up on his elbows; Rose sat with her legs tucked under her. Venetias' golden curls flounced out around her head, her black trousers warmed her legs and her pink coat matched her little pink trainers, she looked so innocent whilst she was sleeping.

The Doctor just sat their watching Venetia trying to remember every detail of her face, every tone of her voice and every shade of gold in her hair. He knew he could just gaze at her all day; he glanced up to see Rose staring at him, a strange smile on her face.

'She's so beautiful' the Doctor murmured looking at Venetia again, Rose smiled and nodded in agreement

'Just like her mother' he told her smiling gently. She blushed and shook her head. He just smiled knowingly at her and lay back to look up at the blue sky that was dotted with white clouds of candy floss. Rose followed his gaze and lay back on the blanket at an angle so her head was near his. He pointed up into the sky

'Look that way' he told her smiling, she followed his hand and looked up into the heavens above

'Remember when we went there?' he asked her, she squinted at the sun

'Where?' she asked trying to pick out a single memory from her millions. He rolled onto his side and grinned at her

'Everywhere!' he joyously exclaimed. Venetia had awakened now and looked at them both as if they were stupid

'You can't have been everywhere!' Venetia exclaimed

'I can go anywhere' the Doctor told her with a grin, she shook her head like a little girl who knew too much

'No you can't – that's impossible!' she exclaimed with her hands on her hips sticking her tongue out. Rose rolled over and grinned

'Sweetheart, you'll soon find that life with your father, anything is possible' the Doctor grinned at Rose whose soft laughter filled the air as Venetia stood looking between them.

'I don't believe you' she told them looking at them smartly. The Doctor reached up and pulled Venetia down who squealed in delight

'Then you're never going to believe the stories I'm going to tell you' he told her grinning. She studied him for a moment then joined her mother in the laughter

'Tell me!' she exclaimed looking up at him, her eyes dancing

'Nope – not if you don't believe' he told her with a mock upset face. She grinned at him and poked him

'I do believe! I promise!' she exclaimed to him, the Doctor grinned at her then looked at Rose

'Well Rose, are you ready to believe?' he teased. She grinned back and moved closer to the Doctor

'Show me how to believe again' she asked him with a mysterious smile. He raised an eye brow at her before he began his story

'A long, long, long time ago in a planet called Gallifrey there was a man who lived in a blue box…' the Doctor began.

Hours later the sun had set and the picnic had been packed up and everything returned to the Tyler flat. Venetia had been bundled into bed, falling asleep the moment her head had hit the pillow for she was exhausted – it had been a very long and exciting day.

The Doctor had spent all day thinking about the future as had Rose. The stories he told – their stories – reminded him of who he was, or who he used to be. The stories had affected Rose as well – she had remembered her past and who she used to be, then she remembered Venetia and the Doctors' way of life. They both knew they needed to talk about it but neither of them knew how.

Rose walked into the kitchen and put the kettle on, the Doctor lent back against the wall and watched Rose busying herself by making cups of tea

'Want a cuppa?' she called over her shoulder. The Doctor had to smile – she sounded exactly like Jackie.

'Please' he replied, Rose nodded as she pulled out various jars and containers

'Still milk and two sugars?' she asked. He grinned – she still remembered

'Yep – you know me too well' he teased. Her face fell

'If only I did' she muttered to herself – the Doctor watched her back, her shoulders were hunched hard at work. The Doctor ran his hands through his hair as Rose turned around – she knew that was something he only did when he was nervous or worried. Rose set the steaming mugs of tea down on the table before she plopped herself down into a chair. She gestured at the one opposite

'Please – take a seat' she invited him. He shook his head as he picked up his mug of tea

'Prefer to stand thanks' he told her as he breathed in the warm steam floating away from the tea. The Doctor slowly took a sip of the tea avoiding Roses' gaze, the taste flooded his mouth bringing back all his memories of Jackie – that woman made a killer cup of tea.

'Mmmm' the Doctor mumbled 'very nice' he praised her making awkward conversation. She nodded in understanding knowing how awkward this must be for him as well. She looked at him and took a deep breath in knowing it was better to get straight to the point

' Venetia needs a father' Rose began watching him carefully

'Now she has one' he chirpily told her – she wasn't amused

'She needs someone who can be here for her, not someone who just pops by for a visit bringing presents and stories from far away places. She needs someone to hold her when she cries, someone to kiss her knees when she falls over, she needs someone to count the stars with and she needs someone she can rely on' Rose told the Doctor willing him to understand what she was saying.

'She has you' he told her simply. Rose rubbed her face

'That's not what I meant' she told him exasperated. The Doctor knew what she meant but he just didn't want to address it. The Doctor rubbed his hair again

'I know what you meant' he slowly told her. She looked up at him, her eyes wide and demanded

'Can you offer that?' she asked him, her eyes filled with the sorrow of his inevitable answer.

'I can!' he told her – her head shot up, it was not the answer she was expecting to hear

'What do you mean you can?' she demanded.

'I can do all those things – even more I _want_ to do all those things' he told her. She stood up and shook her head at him

'But you can't! If you are fighting a monster a thousand miles away, a million years into the future how can you know when she needs you?' Rose angrily demanded, wiping at the tears that were ready to fall. The Doctor walked around the table up to where Rose now stood, her placed his hands on her shoulders and looked down into her eyes – his eyes were honest and loving, begging her to believe what he was saying

'Please Rose, let me be a father to her' the Doctor pleaded. Rose studied him seriously for a moment

'How can I know that you won't break her heart?' she whispered, broken.

'Because I love her' he told her convincingly. Roses' tears began to slide down her face

'But you loved me once yet you still broke my heart' she whispered her voice cracking. The Doctor raised his hand and wiped away a tear

'If it helps, I broke my own heart in the process' he told her 'both of them in fact' this got a small smile from Rose.

'But how can I know? How can I trust you with something so delicate as a child's love?' she asked wishing that she knew the answers.

'You can't know' he gently told her, then he wiped a tear away 'You just have to believe'

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Thanks for reading!

I hope you liked and plan to review...

Some of you were asking about Venetia's future and the Tardis...If I told you it would spoil the plot... but I will say:

There are 14 parts in total to a Recognised Loss

and...

There will be a sequal called A Recognised Gain (which I can't give you the summary of yet because it would also spoil the plot!)

Okay - I'm done rambling!

Hope you enjoed!


	9. Part Nine

Thanks alot everyone for reading and reviewing!

I hope you enjoy!

* * *

A Recognised Loss

Part Nine

Roses' mouth curved into an empty ghost of a smile

'You just want me to believe in you? she asked in disbelief, he smiled at her as though he believed it really was that simple

'Yes' he replied. She shook her head at him

'I can't' she sadly stated. The Doctor took her hand and he held it exactly how he used to

'Why not?' he asked 'You used to believe in me. I remember when you were willing to die for me and what we believed in' he gently stroked her cheek 'What changed?'

'You did' she whispered 'and I did. We grew Doctor – we're not the same people we used to be' she told him urging him to see what she saw

'We're not' he agreed 'We became better people, but Rose, what makes you so sure that we grew apart?' he asked softly. Rose stepped back out of his touch; she bit her lip and smiled sadly

'Because I haven't seen you in six years' she whispered – her eyes showing all the pain she held inside. The Doctors' eyes hardened

'That's not fair – I didn't know about-' he began to defend himself but Rose cut him off. She shook her head

'But that never stopped you from seeing _me_' she told him broken hearted. The Doctor turned away from her and begun to pace

'What was I meant to do? I thought you hated me' he sadly admitted

'Yet I was convinced you hated me' she told him as she lowered herself into the chair again, her head sinking into her hands

'I thought you'd seen better than me – that I was no longer worthy to be your companion – your friend. That you'd picked someone else up along the way and never looked back' she choked on her words

'That's not true – not a day went by where I didn't think of you, of all the companions I'd had it's safe to say none of them are even remotely close to being better than you' Rose smiled into her hand then looked up enquiringly

'So there were others? After me?' she asked curiously. The Doctor winced then slowly nodded

'Not for years after though – it took me so long to get over you' he quietly told her – her eyes gleamed as she grinned at him.

'So you over me yet?' she asked teasing – he shook his head

'Nope – don't think I ever will be' he replied smiling. Rose joined him in his smiled for a moment then turned serious again

'What happened to them?' she asked – his brow furrowed in confusion

'Your other companions? Not locked outside in the Tardis are they' she half joking. He shook his head and turned away from her to lean on a cabinet. Rose could see the reflection of his eyes in the glass cupboard above him – his eyes filled with sorrow and pain

'They all left me'

'How?' she gently asked. He frowned at himself

'I took one home – the other died' he told her solemnly.

'I'm sorry' she replied her voice soft and gentle not really knowing what to say, he nodded in reply

'But none of them were like you' he added after some time. Her face lit up

'Is that a good thing or a bad thing?'

He turned around his entire mood having changed. His eyes now sparkled and his manic grin was in place

'It's a good thing Rose Tyler' he beamed 'A fantastic thing'

She giggled at him. She didn't understand their relationship – she never had, they could turn from deadly serious to barrels of laughter within a moment. Rose frowned to herself – she would never be able to predict the Doctor – that was one thing she knew for sure. They looked at each other for a moment then Rose smiled coyly at him before turning her gaze to the floor

'Doctor…' she begun 'that night – the one we spent together – did you regret it?' she regretted asking him the moment a deadly silence filled the air. She finally managed to tear her gaze away from her slippers to see the doctor beaming at her

'Not for a moment' he enthusiastically replied

'It's just-' Rose began to stumble whilst blushing profoundly 'We never really… talked about it' she begun to look at he fingers now. The Doctor swiftly approached her – he placed one hand on each side of her face

'Well let me say this then' he began grinning at her, his eyes dancing 'It was the best night of my entire life' Rose beamed at him

'And being nine hundred years old' he continued 'that's the best day out of…. ooh 327,600 days – give or take a day. So I think that's saying something' he praised her. Rose giggled then threw her arms around his neck – he pulled her close never wanting to let go

'Thank you' she whispered 'I quite enjoyed it as well' she giggled into his ear before he realised a shout of husky male laughter that warmed Roses' soul.

Venetia lay in her bed wide awake listening intensely to her parents laughing, a single tear ran down her cheek as she hugged her Winnie the Pooh tightly.

'Did you hear that Winnie?' she whispered to her toy 'We can be together – we can be a family' she told the teddy bear before burying her face in it – her tears of joy soaked the yellow fur.

Back in the kitchen Rose had turned the radio on and now sat on the Doctors lap on one of the kitchen chairs. She rested her head on his shoulder, her forehead leaning into his neck – his hands tightened around her body never wanting to leave her. The soft tunes of Frank Sinatra's Everybody Loves Somebody came floating out of the radio filling the kitchen with music. Rose jumped up and turned around to look at the Doctor – a sweet smile on her face, she held out her hand

'Dance with me?' she asked tenderly, he smiled at her and the love her saw in her eyes. He took her hand and stood up

'No-one's asked me to dance in years' he told her, she grinned at him

'The world doesn't end cos the Doctor dances' she whispered. He smiled back at the memory before moving forward to take Rose in his arms. He closed one hand around her waist, his other hand resting on her shoulder – she moved forward so her head was leaning on his shoulder, her arms wrapped around his waist. They gently moved together losing themselves in the thralls of the music and the harmony it played into their souls.

The Doctor and Rose danced to the music in the darkness of the kitchen, shards of moonlight floated through the window giving a soft glow over the room, it wouldn't have mattered if they had been in complete darkness for the love radiating out of them was enough to light the entire world.

Venetia sat in her bed hugging Winnie the Pooh listening to the gentle cords of the music floating through the walls and into her room. She sunk back into her pillows, a knowing smile on her face, because even from in there she could feel the love that came from her parents. She softly began to sing along to the words of the song

'Everybody loves somebody sometime, everybody falls in love somehow' her beautiful voice sang out.

Rose and the Doctor swayed in each others eyes; they looked up into each others eyes

'Your love made it well worth waiting, for someone like you' Venetia sung as her eyelids began to close welcoming sleep and dreams of happy days.

Rose and the Doctor saw their love for one another reflected in each others eyes, they gently moved to the music losing themselves in their memories.

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Thanks for reading!

I hope you'll reveiw!

I'm going on holiday to Ireland this wednesday for a week - and I'm not sure if the hotels have interent connection so if they do I will update around wednesday/thursday but if none of them have interent connection it may be delayed until I come back on the 2nd of August. So hopefully they will have the interent!


	10. Part Ten

Thank you so much everyone for your kind reviews! They really mean alot to me!

Well its very hard to find an interent cafe in the deserted Irish countrysie...but I found one!

So from an internet cafe in Ireland, here is part 10!I Hope you enjoy!

A Recognised Loss

Part 10

It was the morning after the night before and everyone was happy, the Tyler flat was lit up with smiles as everyone thought of the night before.

Venetia was happy – she finally had a family, a mummy and a daddy – she was no longer one of those kids, the ones who don't have dads and get teased, the ones the adults pointed at whispering about Rose being a single mum. She had a mother and a father – she had parents to love her and care for her – she was whole again.

Venetia was sitting on the floor of the living room playing with her Winnie the Pooh toys as she watched her mum and dad on the sofa. They would talk then giggle, move closer together then push each other away. She knew there was something about her dad that she was missing – she could feel it inside of her when she touched him – something different – he felt different to her mum. She watched them intensely for a while just thinking about them, her mum and her dad – the man her Grandma had hated so much. The man who caused her mum to cry so much and for so long, she could remember being a baby – she knew you weren't meant to; but she could. She remembered lying in her crib listening to her mum crying into a pillow, cursing him and his ways, swallowing pills and drinking out of bottles; anything to try and block the pain. Venetia remembered what it was like when her mum had been drinking and Rose told her stories of her father, they were stories that Venetia wasn't meant to understand – but she did. Even worse she remembered them – she had pushed them away to the back of her mind forgetting about them – that was until he returned and told her the exact same stories, almost as if they events they spoke of were….real. Thefive year olds' mind ran it through over and over again, everything they told her – none of it could be real – not a single bit of it… but the way they spoke of those times with such love in their eyes, as though they were really remembering, those were the things that upset Venetia – how they believed the impossible to be true.

Rose and the Doctor lay back against the sofa, his arm wrapped around her as she lent back into him – they were both watching Venetia worriedly. Her face was screwed up in confusion as though she was thinking – she looked exactly like the Doctor – her brown eyes were deeply troubled as she lent back against the wall clutching her teddy bear. She wasn't playing, nor moving, she was just thinking – trying to remember over and over again and that was what upset her parents.

'Vennie?' Rose called out uncertain – she didn't like the look on her daughters face. Venetia didn't reply, she just continued to cling onto her Winnie the Pooh, her face distraught and confused, her brow was furrowed and she was thinking very deeply. Rose jumped up and cautiously walked over to her daughter

'Venetia?' she asked a bit more forcefully this time. When her daughter didn't reply Rose started to really worry, she sat down in front of her daughter and gently shook her

'Sweetheart? Can you hear me?' she asked. There was a huge pause before Venetias' eyes snapped up to stare at her mother – her eyes were cold, like stone gems in her head.

'Why did you bring him back?' she asked quietly, her eyes accusing Rose.

'Bring who back?' she asked worriedly. The Doctor stood behind her equally as worried

'Daddy' she simply stated 'You hated him. When I was little you would talk about him with Grandma, you wished him to be dead; you cried over him, you let him break your heart. You said if you ever saw him again you'd kill him'

Rose gasped

'How can you remember these things?' Rose asked haunted by her little girl – her eyes turned wide and frightened

'I remember everything Mummy – everything that you ever said' she wimpered beginning to sound like the scared little girl that she was.

'Oh, sweetheart' Rose whispered as she pulled the little girl into her arms, Venetia clutched her mother as she let her tears fall

'Why did you lie?' Venetia sobbed as Rose stroked her hair and rubbed her back trying ot soothe the little girl who was so very frightened

'Sometimes grown ups say things they don't mean' she told her softly

'So you're not really going to kill Daddy?' Venetia asked, her sobs beginning to slow down

'No – I'm not' she promised her. Venetia stepped back to look at her mother

'Then why did you say you would?' she asked confused, Rose gently wiped her tears away

'Because I was upset – Daddy and I had an argument and we didn't get to make up until a couple days ago' she reassured her. Venetia bit her lip

'So you don't hate him?' she asked quietly, Rose shook her head and smiled

'No' Venetia then looked up at the Doctor

'Do you hate Mummy?' she quietly asked, he smiled back gently

'No – I never could' he reassured her. Venetia clutched Winnie the Pooh under her chin and looked from one adult to the other.

'You gunna be okay?' Rose softly asked her. Venetia nodded her head then slowly walked out of the room. She sat down on her bed and pulled out her Winnie the Pooh book, quietly reading to herself. She opened the book and pulled her Winnie the Pooh onto her lap

'Sometimes, if you stand on the bottom rail of a bridge and lean over to watch the river slipping slowly away beneath you, you will suddenly know everything there is to be known' Venetia read the words aloud to her teddy bear – then she paused as the words sunk in. She needed to know everything; all the questions floating around in her head had to be answered

'You will suddenly know everything there is to be known' Venetia repeated thoughtfully to her toy.

'That's it!' she exclaimed. She jumped off her bed taking Winnie with her; she quietly opened her door and walked down the hallway leaving the book open in the middle of her bed. She quietly pulled her coat and shoes on before opening the front door, she glance behind her before she pulled it shut. She began to run down the landing and towards the park – she knew where the river was, her Grandma used to take her there. Clutching Winnie the Pooh she ran through the park her blonde curls dancing manically on her head as her face was set in a determined expression.

'What was that about?' the Doctor asked Rose sometime later. Rose shook her head as she lent back into the sofa – they had decided it would be best to leave her alone for a while.

'Not a clue' she replied. The Doctor looked out the window over the city, the sun was getting low in the sky and a cool breeze was carrying the leaves through the air.

'Can you go and get her?' Rose asked, 'dinners nearly ready'

He nodded and walked towards her room. The Doctor opened the door to be met by a deadly silence, the room was empty, her cupboard was open and a book lay abandoned on her bed next to a pile of used tissues.

'Rose!' the Doctor yelled.

* * *

Thanks for reading!

I hope you liked and will review!

Next update will either be next wednesday or before depending on where and when I can find another interent cafe as I'm still in Ireland untill Wednesday.


	11. Part Eleven

Thanks everyone for your reviews!

I am in yet another Irish Internet cafe and I send you the next update!

Enjoy!

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A Recognised Loss

Part 11

The Doctors' yell chilled Rose right into her soul – she recognised his tone of voice – he only ever used it when there was trouble. She dropped the plates and ran toward Venetias' bedroom, a million scenarios flashing through her mind at once. She came to a stop in the doorway, panting, her eyes wide and frantically glancing around

'She's gone Rose' the Doctor softly told her. Rose froze – it couldn't be

'Gone? What do you mean gone? Gone where?' she began to panic as her eyes began to well.

'She's just not here' the Doctor gently told her, Rose looked around the room at the open cupboard and the abandoned book

'Who's taken her? Who has my baby?' she cried. The Doctor walked up to her, his hands on her shoulders

'I don't know' he gravely told her 'But I'm going to find out, and that person will have hell to pay' he vowed. Rose nodded but her lip continued to tremble

'My poor baby' she whispered as she frantically wiped her tears away with the back of the hand.

The Doctor began to search the room

'What I don't understand' he began as he opened draws and looked in cabinets 'is why anyone would want to take her'

Rose joined him in the search occasionally stopping to wipe away her tears. The Doctor pulled out the Sonic Screwdriver and held it up into the air – Rose smiled sadly

'You still have that thing?' she asked, he nodded

'Yep. I'm just searching for any other wavelength so we know if someone – or something – was tracking her' Roses' eyes opened wide

'They've been following her?' she asked desperately pleading for it not to be true. He dropped the Sonic Screwdriver back into his pocket

'Nope – just thought I'd better check' he assured her. Rose stopped her pacing for a moment when she came across a photo of herself and Venetia, she stroked the photo

'Where are you?' she whispered to the picture as her tear drops soaked it.

Venetia felt like she had been running forever, her little legs continued to pound against the pavement under her, her breath had become shallow and irregular, and she could feel her cheeks flushing. She began to slow down, her hand still holding onto Winnie who was flailing along beside her, she slowed down to walking pace and saw a bench – she gratefully dropped onto it.

'We'll just rest for a minute Winne' she assured the teddy bear. Her eyes were wide in the darkness as the evening drew close, she could feel her heart pounding as people walked by her staring. She looked at her teddy before she closed her eyes

'You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think' she muttered the words of her favourite Winnie the Pooh story over and over again trying to convince herself that she would be alright. She was so sure that she was close to the river – but she'd been running for what felt like hours and it seemed the further she ran the further away from the river she became. She blinked back the tears and fear that was threatening to overwhelm her. She hugged Winnie close to her heart

'Even when we're apart I'll always be with you' Venetia whispered to her bear recalling the words her father had read to her from the story before promising they were true.

'It's okay Winnie' she reassured the bear 'We're not alone – Daddy's with us' she told Winnie before she stopped to think.

'What would Daddy do?' she asked herself remembering his stories. Then she knew she couldn't give up – she had come this far and she most certainly would find the river – even if it was the last thing she did. The little girl jumped off the bench, her blonde curls now tangled together, her breath was becoming visible in the night air but Venetia didn't care – she had a plan. She grabbed Winnie and began to run again.

The Doctor froze as he found the Winnie the Pooh book – the words on the page leapt out at him

'Rose' he called softly – she was at his side in a second

'I think you should look at this' he told her as he read the words of the story. Rose frantically scanned the page before looking up at him, her eyes wide and afraid

'She wanted answers didn't she?' the Doctor thought aloud – Rose slowly nodded her head before it hit her.

'So she thought she could find the answers in the river like Winnie the Pooh could?' she realised frantically, she brought her hands to her mouth as she truth dawned on her. The Doctor stared worriedly at the page for a moment as Rose stood up and clutched at the photo of her missing daughter.

'My poor baby' she whispered to the photo 'What answers are you searching for?'

The Doctor turned to look at Rose, his eyes dark and dangerous

'I'll get her back – I promise' he vowed to her. She could tell that he meant it – he would protect her with the last breath in his body – it was in that moment Rose realised he really was a father.

The Doctor strode out of the room pulling his coat on in the process; Rose followed him putting her jacket on as well

'Does she know how to get to the river?' the Doctor asked as he opened the front door, Rose stopped to think

'I don't think so…' she began but then she remembered 'Oh! Mum used to take her there when she was little; she always loved to watch the boats'

The Doctor nodded as he slammed the door shut behind him. He offered his hand out to Rose who readily accepted it

'Lead the way' he commanded; together they ran down the roads hand in hand just like the old days – except they weren't running from danger now, they were looking for the little girl who lit up both of their lives.

Venetia had stopped running and now walked slowly through the dark London streets, she shivered as she huddled into her coat – the air was getting colder as she approached the river. Her face was a mixture of fear and worry as she wandered further and further away from home and into the darkness. She knew she was getting closer, she could smell the water – if only she knew what direction to go in. She carefully climbed on top of a bench still holding onto Winnie – she looked out trying to decide what direction to go in, then she saw the river. It was a huge body of water, dark and gleaming in the darkness, a few lights sparkled off of it but the river absorbed the rest of the reflections – the water almost seemed black under the faint gleam of the moonlight. Venetia shivered as she clutched Winnie closer – she had a bad feeling.

'We're almost there' she told her teddy as she jumped down from the bench. The sound of her tiny footsteps echoed off every wall as she made her way through the darkness towards the river bank, she shivered ignoring the hairs that were standing on end at the back of her neck, she just repeated the same phrase over and over again

'Even when we're apart I'll always be with you'

When Venetia finally reached the river it was most defiantly night time, the sun had disappeared hours ago and the moon had come out in its place. The stars lit up the night sky, barely visible due to the fog that covered London; she gazed at the stars remembering their names trying to distract herself. There was a long bridge that went over the river, she looked at it thoughtful for a moment then she turned to her teddy

'We're gunna go over that bridge, okay?' she asked the bear who didn't reply.

'Okay' she assured herself as she walked onto the bridge. She stopped dead in the centre looking down over the viscous waves that crashed and dived into one another. All lights drowned in the darkness of the river, she knew if she fell in that she would never be coming back out. With Winnie tucked inside her coat she leant forward over the railing holding on tightly – she could feel herself shaking as she looked down into the darkness.

'Okay' she assured herself again 'I'm looking into the river'

As she looked down she could just about make out the reflection of a little girl with a halo of blonde curls, her face was pale and rosy rings circled her cheeks, her eyes were wide and frightened as nothing reflected back in them – her mouth was red and parted. She looked into the river searching for answers but all she could find was herself

'What's the answer?' she whispered to the river, the wind howled splashing gentle droplets of water up into her face. She stared at the river angrily

'Who are my parents?' she asked the river now shouting 'Who are they really?' she screamed as tears began to fall down her face. She stared down into the river still only able to see the hysterical little girl in the waves – then she realised the truth.

'It doesn't matter who they are' she whispered to the river as it dawned on her 'Whoever they are, that's who I am as well. I'm the same as them' she whispered to herself as a chill ran through her body. She blinked back her tears and stepped back away from the edge, she turned to go home when she felt a hand on her shoulder, she looked up to see where the hand came from. The scream of a petrified little girl echoed off all the buildings in London reverberating back to its' source – the river hungrily accepted the screams that showed no sign of stopping.

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Thanks for reading everyone!

Hope you liked and will review... :-)


	12. Part Twelve

Thanks for reviewing everyone! You guys are great!

I'm back from Ireland so this chapter is coming from my house and not a random interent cafe. I had a good time - thanks!

Hope you enjoy!

(Aren't cliff hangers nasty?)

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A Recognised Loss

Part Twelve

Rose and the Doctor heard the scream – they both recognised it instantly as it shot through their bodies and into their souls.

'Venetia!' they both shouted as they began to sprint in the direction of the scream.

Venetia looked up into the eyes of the stranger, it was an old man in his fifties at least, he was hunched over, his dead thin grey hair hanging forward over his shoulder and flapping in the wind caressing Venetias' face. Every time the hair touched her a new wave of fear would shoot through her followed by a violent set of tremors. The man had grey, dull eyes that scared Venetia – they were hollow, lifeless and they looked her up and down. He smiled a toothless grin, his tongue passing over his empty gums in a taunting manner

'Well what do we have here?' he asked clutching Venetia by her shoulders, the mans voice was hoarse and crackled like the sound of burning timber – his voice chilled Venetia right through to her soul. Her mouth opened on a scream but it never came – the man pressed his grubby finger against her soft lips – he wore gloves, the kind that had the fingertips cut off. His hunched figure was covered by a dull grey coat, stained and torn from years of wear. His grey beard was ferocious and wild – Venetia was almost frozen with fear. She ignored the mans fingers on her lips and let out another soul wrenching scream as her fingers dug into her teddy.

As the screams became louder and more terrifying the Doctor and Rose were beginning to fear for their daughters' safety more and more. Each scream sent a new wave of fear through them as they began to imagine the thousands of terrible things that could happen to a little girl alone in the darkened streets of London. Each time Rose closed her eyes she could see Venetia smiling, laughing, playing – then followed by a news bulletins of various children kidnapped, missing, found dead – she was not going to let her daughter become another statistic. With that thought in her mind Rose began to sprint along side the Doctor. Rose never knew she could run this fast – well she'd never had a reason to, but now she did – she was running to save the most important thing in the world, her daughter.

Venetia was frozen with fear as the mans bad breath lingered in her face, his fingers dug into her shoulders and she winced with pain. She was almost frozen with fear but then she remembered the stories that her mum and dad had told her – how they laughed in the face of danger, how they fought with their last breaths and how they always came out alive. Knowing that she was their daughter, in so many ways she was prepared to fight back - she wasn't one to go down without a fight – she kicked the man in the shins – hard - he yelped and let go of her, Venetia took this chance and began to frantically run away from him back along the bridge to where she came from. She could hear the foot steps pounding along behind her as the old man gave a chase, she clutched onto Winnie as she ran and ran – her legs already tired from the running that happened earlier.

The Doctor and Rose knew they were getting close, they could hear the screams becoming louder and louder and the icy atmosphere around the bridge continued to increase. The Doctor and Rose froze in their tracks as they saw a frantic little girl running down a road, blonde curls flailing along behind her and a Winnie the Pooh flying at her side. Behind the girl an old man ran reaching out trying to grab her into his lecherous grasp. Roses' scream pierced the air causing the man to stop in his tracks, the little girl continued to run forward

'Mummy! Daddy!' she screamed as she hurled herself in their direction.

'Venetia!' Rose screamed as she ran towards her daughter, her arms open. Venetia threw herself into her mothers arms, her arms tightly clamped around her neck. Rose buried her face in Venetia's hair, her tears falling fast and freely

'Oh my baby' she whispered as she clung to her. The Doctor stalked forwards towards the man

'She alright?' he called over his shoulder – his voice deadly serious

Rose knelt down in front of her, grasping her shoulders wanting to shake her

'Why did you run off? Why would you do something so stupid?' she begged her voice cracking as her tears fell, her daughter stared back wide eyed and frightened – Rose pulled her into her arms again

'Are you alight? Sweetheart, are you okay?' she asked into Venetia's hair. The little girl clutched at her mother again and nodded slowly

The Doctor was swiftly approaching his prey – initially the man had frozen in place at the sight of the Doctors furious eyes staring out of the darkness – he had then turned to flee. The Doctor had chased after him before grabbing the back of his coat and pulling him to the floor, he now stood over him, his boots beside the mans head.

'What the hell' he began as booted foot collided with the mans stomach 'do you think you are doing to my daughter'

The man winced as the Doctor kicked him

'I just…. saw her and tried to …. help her' the man began to weakly lie. The Doctor grabbed the man by his neck and pulled him to his feet – he stared down into the mans face, his eyes wild and darkened with anger, his face was twisted into an angry glare and his eyes were narrowed. He was very tempted to strangle the man right this second but he managed to refrain – instead his fingers rested around the mans throat, an unspoken threat.

'If I so much as see you even looking at her again – even thinking of her and I swear they will never find your body after I'm finished with you' he spat into the mans face. He could feel the man trembling under his fingers but the Doctor didn't care – he wanted the man to feel as scared as Venetia must have done. Just as he was about to finish his threat the man started and kicked the Doctor – the Doctor stumbled backwards as the man began to run off, the Doctor turned to give a chase but something stopped him – a little voice calling out of the darkness

'Daddy?' it asked sounding so small and vulnerable. He turned around and saw his baby girl shaking in her mothers arms, the Doctor jogged back over to them. He gently stroked a piece of hair off her face

'You okay?' he asked softly looking into the little girls wide brown eyes, she nodded slowly before throwing one arm around his neck, the Doctor moved forward clutching his daughter to her. There they stood – the three off them clinging onto one another trying to block out the fears of moments before.

As they began to walk down the street back home the Doctor noticed Venetia shivering – Rose was carrying her, holding her close but it didn't seem to be keeping the chills at bay. He stopped and pulled his coat of and gently draped it over Rose's shoulder falling forwards over Venetia – she gratefully sunk into the depths of the coat savouring the warmth.

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Hope you liked. Please review?

More bad news - I'm going to Cornwall at 3am tomorrow so I won't be able to update for a while. The house we are staying in doesn't have interent access and the family I'm going with don't seem the type to let me disappear for hours to visit interent cafes. So I don't think I'm going to be able to update again until Saturday the 12th of August - sorry!


	13. Part Thirteen

I'm back!

Thanks for waiting over a week for the update - its been horrible being interent free!

Thanks for all your reviews they really mean alot, I hope this chapter was worth waiting for!

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A Recognised Loss 

Part 13

Some time later the threesome had returned to the Tyler flat. Venetia had changed into her pyjamas and sat bundled beneath layers of blankets as she sat on the sofa. She had been fed endless cups of hot chocolate until the colour had returned to her face and lips. The Doctor and Rose paced the room drinking cups of tea in their vain attempt to warm themselves. They didn't know what to say to their daughter who just snuggled against her teddy with haunted eyes. All they did know was that the fear was subsiding and anger was quickly approaching to take its place.

Rose knelt in front of Venetia as the Doctor lent back on the mantle place. She had so many questions she wanted to ask her daughter but she just didn't have any clue of where to start. Rose rubbed her face as she sighed; she looked up at her daughter who was avoiding her gaze by staring intensely at her teddy bear.

'Sweetheart' Rose began carefully as she rubbed her head 'What were you thinking?'

Venetia slowly raised her head before meeting her mothers' eyes, her eyes were wide and uncertain whiles Roses' were worried and tired. Venetia bit her bottom lip as she tried to think of what to say – Rose sighed to herself

'Were you running away?' she asked trying a different approach. Venetia frantically shook her head

'No! I wasn't – I swear!' she told her mother, her eyes wide and honest. Rose nodded slowly

'Okay. Then what were you doing?' she pleaded with her daughter who looked so troubled and she just didn't know why.

'I was looking for answers' she quietly told her mum as she began to look at her bear again. The Doctor slowly walked over to her and sat down beside her, using one hand to stroke her hair he asked

'What were the questions?' the Doctor asked softly studying her eyes trying to make out what she was hiding. She looked up at him and met his eyes

'Lots of questions' she whispered 'but it doesn't matter' she added after a moment 'Because I found the answers'

'In the river?' Rose asked exasperated. Venetia nodded as she smiled slowly – it was her fathers' grin.

'Sweetie, you know life isn't like a Winnie the Pooh story – you can't really find answers in a river' she told her trying her to realise the truth.

'But I can!' she exclaimed 'I did!' she repeated quietly. Rose sighed again and stood up; sometimes she just didn't understand her daughter. The Doctor ignored Rose and looked at Venetia

'Vennie – what did you see?' he asked her quietly, she looked up at him and studied him for a moment.

'I saw…myself' she whispered as though she was still milling it over in her mind. The Doctor stroked another lock of hair off her face as he studied her intensely

'Is that what you were looking for?' he gently prodded. She shook her head

'I don't know what I was looking for – but I think I found it, if that makes sense' she told him thoughtfully. He nodded and smiled softly at her

'I understand what you mean'

She smiled at him

'It doesn't matter who you are because we are the same' she told him wisely as he pulled her into his arms for a hug. The Doctors' brow furrowed as he held her close, he didn't understand what she meant but he didn't want to press her for answers when she seemed to be content.

Rose watched the Doctor and Venetia together and couldn't help but worry – worry what they would do once he left, because that was what he did – he could never stay in one place.

It was a few days later and everything had returned to normal – well almost everything. Venetia was beginning to act like herself again – a carefree child, Rose was learning to worry less as she knew that the Doctor really did want to be a dad, and the Doctor was settling into a routine. This routine was get up, play games, go to the park, eat chips, gaze at the stars, read stories, then go to bed. He was becoming very humanised and he wasn't sure if this should worry him or not.

The Doctor had been in the living room playing with Venetia, he had gone to his coat pocket to find out the Sonic Screwdriver – he had wanted to show her it worked and he wasn't really lying but instead his hand fell upon the psychic paper. He looked down at the pouch it was in and smiled to himself remembering how handy the paper had been time and time again. He opened it just to check it was still there but instead he found a message that had been hastily scribbled

_Doctor – come at once. Help me – please?_

The Doctor froze – the note wasn't signed, but he could feel the pain and fear through the paper that someone else was suffering. He knew he had to help – that's what he did, that was the life he led. Then he heard it – the singing of the happy little girl in the living room – he knew he was about to make a decision that could break so many hearts.

'Rose?' he softly called out as he walked into the kitchen. She followed him in carrying the ironing basket as she sorted out the clothes

'Yeah?' she asked as she folded various pink skirts and frilly child's clothing. The Doctor began to fidget playing with his fingers, he had thought it through and there was nothing he could do – he had to go, he had to help, it was who he was. He'd thought about not going but he knew that wasn't even an option, he couldn't confine someone to death just because he wanted to read a Winnie the Pooh story to his little girl – something deep inside of him knew it was wrong.

'I think you should see this' he told Rose quietly as he passed her the psychic paper. Her face lit up the moment she saw it

'Oh god! You still have this stuff?' she asked whilst chuckling. She turned the battered leather pouch over and over in her hands savouring the texture smiling at her memories of it.

'Open it' he said his voice hoarse. She glanced at him curiously before slowly opening it, she stopped for a moment to read the message before her brow was pulled into a frown

'Who calling?' she asked curious remembering the thrill of the chase. The Doctor shrugged

'But I need to find out' he told her carefully. She paused for a moment then her face fell

'No! Don't you dare!' she warned as she realised what he meant. He looked troubled as he stared at Rose with the truth of his words in his eyes

'You know me Rose – you know that I don't want to go but I have to' he began to explain but Rose cut him off

'You don't have to go! You can stay here with us' she tried weakly. He walked towards her shaking his head

'You know I can't' he told her softly 'I can't just let someone die'

Roses' eyes began to water as the truth of his words hit home.

'But…' she began to whimper as he placed his hands on her shoulders 'What about Vennie?' she asked her voice cracking. The Doctor swallowed hard

'I'll be back, I promise' he told her tenderly, she shook her head as her tears began to fall.

'You promised! You said you wanted to be a father to her! You told me that you would always be here for her!' Rose shouted at him

'I know – and I will be' he told her calmly

'How can you?' she shouted 'If you are dieing five million years into the future, how can you know when she will need you?' she asked, her heart breaking

'I'll always know' he promised her

'And what about me? I've needed you these last six years but you didn't know that did you?' she whispered, her eyes wide and broken.

The Doctor walked up to her and stared her straight in the eye

'Rose there is no power on this earth that can keep me from you or her. I knew we would meet again, when the time was right' he told her from the bottom of his heart. He wiped her tears away with the back of her hand

'I'll always be here for you Rose. For both of you. I didn't know what living was until I met you and now that we have her as well….it's just….' the Doctor stumbled. He couldn't think of any words that described the feeling that came over him when he saw Rose and Venetia together.

Rose bit her lip as she watched his eyes, she knew every word he was saying was true, she wanted to smile – she so badly wanted to smile but the tears just kept on falling. Nothing could describe the feeling of watching the love of your life walking away from you – again.

'When will you be back?' she asked quietly, the softness of her voice contrasted dramatically with the crude humming of various appliances in the background. She bit her lip trying to keep the tears from splashing down her face again; the Doctor gently placed one hand on her cheek and wiped a tear away with his thumb. He looked down into her eyes and opened his mouth to speak

'Going where?' a scared little voice called from the doorway.

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This is the penultimate chapter!

But don't worry as the sequal is well under way!

Hope you enjoyed and will review!


	14. Part Fourteen

Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing this story! I hope you enjoy the final chapter!

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A Recognised Loss

Part 14

The Doctor and Rose instantly released each other and turned around to face Venetia.

'Do you want to or shall I?' Rose quietly asked the Doctor. He took a deep breath in, his face determined

'I will' he told her. Venetia watched him warily; he knelt down in front of her so he could talk to her at her level.

'Where are you going?' she asked sounding hurt. The Doctor paused

'You remember all those stories I told you? The ones of how I help people, how I travel and people call out to me?' he asked softly. She slowly nodded her eyes studying his

'Well someone asked me for help, and I have to help them' he began to explain to her.

'But you promised' she whispered, he looked at her confused for a moment

'You promised you'd always be here' she said as her eyes began to well and her lip began to wobble. He stroked her cheek

'And I always will be – in your heart' he gently told her. She shook her head at him

'It's not the same!' she cried as she stepped back away from his touch.

'Venetia – I'll be back, I promise' he tried to tell her as she glared at him

'You promised you'd stay here – how will I know if you'll keep this promise?' she asked sounding exactly like Rose. The Doctor sighed, he was frustrated, he just wanted her to understand and not argue the point.

'Venetia…' he began as he rubbed his face. She quickly changed from anger to fear

'Am I that terrible?' she asked in a small frightened voice. His eyes shot open in an instant,

'What do you mean?' he asked perplexed. Venetia's lip had stopped trembling due to the fact that she was now biting it down; tears began to run down her face

'Am I that terrible that after only just finding me you want to leave already?' she whispered sounding incredibly tortured. The Doctor was appalled; he almost didn't know what to say to that – he grasped her shoulders and looked her straight in the eye. His eyes were unwavering and brutally honest

'If I had a choice I would never leave you' he told her fiercely, she looked at him, her eyes wide and unsure

'But you are' she whispered. The Doctors' face fell – he didn't know why she couldn't understand. Venetia shook her head and ran out of the room crying, the Doctor stared dumbfounded after her. Rose walked up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder

'Let her adjust' she gently told him. He shook his head as he scratched his hair

'I just don't get it' he muttered. Rose was still standing over him and rested her head just over his shoulder so her cheek was pressed against his.

'This is all new to her' Rose reminded him softly. The Doctor sighed; he had never thought it would be so hard to be a Father. Rose took the Doctors' hands and gently tugged him to his feet; he stood looking down their hands interlocked.

'So do you hate me as well?' he half joked and half sighed. Rose squeezed his hands

'She doesn't hate you, she's just upset' she told him. He smiled sadly

That's not what I asked' he told her softly. She grinned up at him

'I could never hate you' she whispered. The Doctor smiled at his sweet, loyal Rose, he raised one hand to gently cup her cheek

'Oh Rose' he murmured 'What did I do to deserve you?' he asked as he stared down into her eyes – he could drown from the love he saw in them. She put her arms around his waist and he pulled her close just holding her savouring her touch. He loved how her head fitted under his chin, how she was just the right size for his arms to hold her tightly, how her leg slipped between his so easily and how she loved to be soothed by the sound of his twin hearts beating against her ear. They were a perfect fit – but he had to go, he had to leave her and each time he did his heart broke a little bit more.

Several hours later the Doctor gently knocked on Venetia's door, he had waited until the sound of muffled sobs had stopped.

'Come in' a quiet voice called out, the Doctor poked his head round the corner and smile softly at her

'Can we talk?' he asked gently. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and nodded

'Thanks' he said with a smile as he quietly closed the door behind him. He walked up to where she sat huddled on her bed, he sat on the edge of the bed and they watched each other for a moment.

'Sweet heart, I want you to know –' the Doctor began but Venetia cut him off by pressing one of her little fingers against his lips.

'Daddy' she began, her eyes wide and truthful – they also showed an amount of wisdom

'You'll come back won't you?' she asked worriedly.

'Of course' he promised her. Venetia nodded

'Okay then' she said with a smile

'Okay what?' the Doctor asked grinning

'I forgive you' she told him as she threw her arms around his neck. He caught her and held her close never wanting to let go of the little girl who had won his heart so easily. He picked her up and carried her into the living room; they sat down on the arm chair with Venetia in the Doctors' lap. Winnie the Pooh was in Venetia's lap as she held a Winnie the Pooh story book. The Doctor began to slowly read her the story, he paused as the words became real – his voice cracked

'Promise you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave' Venetia's lip began to quiver as the familiar words of the story became a final plea from a heartbroken father. Venetia slowly twisted round so she was facing him; her brown eyes were wide and earnest

'I'll never forget you Daddy, I promise' she vowed to him before she threw her arms around his neck burying her face in his shoulder. The Doctor held her close overwhelmed by the amount of love he felt in his heart for this amazing little girl

'Thank you' he whispered to her and they just sat that way. The little girl clinging to the father she never thought she could have, a father clutching the daughter he thought was impossible to exist and the mother standing in the doorway softly crying at the love of her life who she thought she would never see again and the little girl who had filled their worlds.

The next morning outside the Powell estate a family stood outside a blue 1950's police box. A woman in her late twenties had her blonde hair gently settled over her shoulders, her face pulled into a smile, her eyes blinking trying not to cry. Next to her stood a beautiful little girl with blonde ringlets bouncing around her face, tears stained her cheeks and she clutched tightly onto a Winnie the Pooh teddy. In front of them stood a tall thin man, his hands were clenched in reaction to what he had to do, his brown hair stood up into the air and his cloak flapped in the autumn wind.

The Doctor stepped forward and held out one hand to Roses' cheek, he stood so close to her that their noses were almost touching, he smiled gently at her

'I'll see you soon' he promised her. She nodded in return blinking back tears as she looked at the floor

'How long till you come back?' she squeaked

'Give me a date and I'll be there' he told her. She smiled at him

'I guess this is goodbye then' she whispered heartbroken

'It's never goodbye' he promised her as he stepped forward and pressed his lips to hers. She squeaked in reaction to his sudden embrace before leaning into his kiss whilst running her fingers through his hair. He tightened his hands around her waist deepening the kiss – it was quickly becoming very passionate as the Doctor moaned against her lips.

'Ewww!' Venetia exclaimed whilst grinning at her parents. They slowly parted, the Doctors' eyes were lazy and gleamed with satisfaction, they were both panting and Rose slowly licked her lips. They grinned at each other like a pair of love struck teenagers. When the Doctor finally managed to stop staring at Rose he turned to Venetia and knelt in front of her

'I'm gunna miss you kiddo' he told her, she smiled back.

'I'm gunna miss you too Daddy' she told him smiling sweetly. He cupped her cheek

'It's crazy how much I love you' he told her, his words apparent in his eyes, she grinned back.

'I know what you mean – but it's nothing compared to how much I love you' he couldn't reply to that – he could only hold her in his arms.

'I'll never forget you Daddy – I promise' she whispered

'Good' he replied softly. He let go of her

'Remember, I'll always be with you' he told her tapping where her heart was 'in there'

She nodded before pressing a kiss to his cheek; he kissed her forehead and stood up.

'Right, I'll see you soon' he promised as he turned to leave.

'I love you – both of you' he told them sincerely as he winked at Rose. He turned to open the Tardis door but was stopped

'Daddy!' a frantic voice called – he turned around

'Yeah?' he asked. She held out a package

'You forgot his' she said beaming at him, he took the package and reached into his pocket producing an envelope which he then handed to her. He hugged his daughter one last time before stepping inside the Tardis; he looked over his shoulder and blew a kiss before closing the doors. Rose and Venetia watched in wonder – the child squealing in delight as the blue box disappeared and she realised all the stories he had told her were true.

The Doctor lent against the control panel as he opened the envelope, three things fell out – they were all photos. The first one Venetia had taken of the Doctor and Rose sleeping, he smiled at it before turning it over – on the back it read:

_Forever and always, Love Rose x x x_

The Doctor beamed before looking at the second photo. It was the one of Venetia and the Doctor that Rose had taken; they both looked so happy and so excited. On the back in a child's hand writing it said one of Venetia's favourite Winnie the Pooh quotes

_If there ever comes a day when we can't be together, keep me in your heart I'll stay there forever. I love you Daddy, love Vennie x x x_

The Doctor didn't know it was possible to smile this much, he looked at the last photo it was one of the three of them that they had taken at the park, on the back it said

_Better late than never_

The Doctor slowly pinned the photos to the wall overwhelmed at the emotion that filled him – it was love.

Back in the flat Rose and Venetia sat on the sofa together and opened the envelope. A single scrap of paper fell out; this time he had used a familiar quote and a Jeremy Irons quote

_Rose, when there are lines upon my face from a lifetime of smiles, when the time comes to embrace for one long last while, we can laugh about how time really flies, we won't say goodbye cos true love never dies. You'll always be beautiful in my eyes_

_Vennie, remember we all have our time machines. Some take us back, they're called memories and some take us forward, they're called dreams._

_I'll be with you in your dreams and memories_

_Love the Doctor x x x_

Rose and her daughter smiled before gazing at the photos, they lost themselves in the same love that he Doctor felt. No matter how much time of how many galaxies were between them nothing could split up this family – or so they thought.

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I hope you enjoy reading this story! So do you have any last thoughts?

The sequal will be called A Recognised Gain and I will start posting this on Friday. Here is a summary for it:

The Doctor returns to earth to visit Rose and his daughter, Venetia, only to discover terrible news and to be faced with a life changing decison.

I hope you'll read it :-)


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